confessions

*splish* *splish* *splash* !!

the rain is beating down heavily upon my windows and the cool winds feels so cold on my skin.
i'm snuggled on my comfy couch writing these words down.. it will even be better with a nice cup of hot cocoa *slurps*

our finances are not looking good, really. its so bad that somehow, it feels like a joke, though its not very funny. its how people get bankrupt (what a dirty word), gets depressed and end up suicidal. it is bleak alright, but nothing that God cannot do. somehow, the world seems much real when you're going through the situations which you think only other people goes through.

like how we always read about families struggling to feed their children, no money to pay off the bills, loansharks turning up in the middle of the night, you know? those kind of things that happened to other people, but not you?

well, we may not have loansharks turning up at our door, or us struggling to feed the kids (no kids, yet) but the amount of bills thats piling up is just, unbelievable. and you wonder why people got married in the first place, hmm?

anyway, i woke up today having a confident expectation of good. even when the money seems like its drying up, i still can expect good to come out of it. when the downtimes come, it is up i look. no matter how i fall, i still fall into a confident expectation of good to come. i must'nt let this pull me down. because i have a awesome jesus who has died to give me all my blessings. to let this put me down, is to let Him died in vain.

no, i must'nt do that.

instead, i will continue to sing His songs, soak in His word and feel His love for me. because when it matters the most, jesus is all i've got.